Why do we not have healthy conversations with those that are homeless? There are multiple reasons why we fail. First, we are afraid. Sometimes these men and women appear to be like the demoniac described in the Bible. I have seen a person like that. I had heard rumors of her being a rough character, being banned from a local soup kitchen. This soup kitchen was well known as a place that gave grace to some of the most egregious behaviors, so getting banned was quite the feat. What I had seen of her she looked like a stereotypical librarian. Her hair was typically in a bun. She wore clothing that seemed to cover most of her body. Her nose was always in a book. Our conversations were always pleasant and were often deeply intellectual.
One evening, though, a different version of this woman appeared at our back gate. She arrived with her hair askew and demanding entry as she threatened everyone in sight. While she was worked up, it did not seem appropriate to open the gate. That is when she began trying to rip the gate off of its hinges. When police were called, she took off, and I did not see her for many weeks. It turns out that this was a reaction to a drug that was called spice. When the drug had worked itself out of her system, she was again bookish and pleasant. Yes, these men and women can be scary, but if we will work past the fear, we might discover a friend.
Another reason that we avoid conversations is that we assume that they will lie to us. There is an old joke that does have an element of truth to it regarding those in addiction and lying. How can you tell when an addict is lying? Their mouth is moving. The problem with this is the assumption that all that are on the street are struggling with addiction. While common, it is not certain that those on the streets are living in addiction. All of those that are in poverty and homeless are there because of broken relationships. Sometimes, drugs have led to that break in family or friends.
Finally, we fear the conversation because we figure what do we have in common? Are we to discuss the best dumpster to eat from or the best church bushes to hide in for a good night’s sleep? Actually, in many cases these men and women might be highly educated. At one time, I had done a survey of those that we were serving at the mission where I was working. Over the course of six months, we only had one with a doctorate degree, but there was nearly an even split among those that had no degree, high school degree, undergraduate and graduate degrees. Add to that the experiences they have had, and you have the fodder for a great conversation. Besides, we too have a whole host of broken relationships as well. In this, we are pretty much the same as these men and women.
When we take time to learn that these men and women have a name and a story, we will actually be able to love them well. It will cause us to no longer pity them, but with eyes opened and the help of the Holy Spirit, we can see them as God sees them. They are beautiful creations designed by God for good works.
